A Urologist Explains How Edging Can Help You Level Up Your Orgasms
Urologist and sex educator Rena Malik, MD uses her YouTube channel to help people enjoy a healthy sex life by busting myths and sharing medical information around sexual health. In a recent video, Malik addresses everything that you should know about orgasm control, or "edging."
Malik explains that edging can be used for a number of reasons, most prominently to increase pleasure, to enable couples to reach orgasm at the same time, and to learn more about what kind of stimuli you might find pleasurable. She adds that a version of edging known as the stop-start method is also used as a means of treating premature ejaculation.
"There are a few things the body does when our body is getting excited prior to the point of no return or climax," she says. "First of all, the tension in your muscles increases; that could be in your abdominals, you pelvic floor muscles, your gluteal muscles, they're all increasing in tension. Your respiration starts going more and more rapidly, often people are thrusting their pelvis more aggressively, often people are very focused on the sensations occurring that are causing sexual stimulation, as well as increasing the rapidity of the pelvic thrust, and overall just having more pleasure. So the way to essentially prevent climax from happening is to increase the length of this sexual excitation phase."
One way to do this, explains Malik, is to focus on your breathing: instead of breathing rapidly with your chest, try slower, abdominal breathing. This will help to relax those tense muscles. Additionally, she suggests moderate, slow levels of intensity in stimulation, rather than "hard and fast."
"You shouldn't try to distract yourself from the sexual stimuli by thinking of something non-sexual, because that can really cause a lot of discomfort and anxiety during the sexual encounter, and is really not adding to the experience," she continues.
Before trying edging, there are a couple of cons to consider, such as epididymal hypertension, a.k.a. "blue balls," caused by an increase in blood flow to the genitals and pelvic floor muscles, which can create an uncomfortable, pressured feeling if not released. Another possible down-side to edging if performed alone is idiosyncratic masturbation, where an individual becomes used to only being able to feel pleasure in very specific circumstances which might be difficult to recreate with a partner.
One thing you don't need to worry about, however, is what happens to your semen if you don't reach orgasm. "If you don't ejaculate, either your body will reabsorb the semen or you will ejaculate at nighttime and have a nocturnal emission," says Malik.